Introducing, Rylie! aka: personal shopper!! :)

School clothes shopping is always the best part of going back to school. School supplies had been purchased weeks ago and newly bought clothes managed to stay untouched and in mint condition for over a week now. So... today was the 'pick up a few more items' day. Or.... maybe we should rename it to 'i have 3 daughters who am i kidding, it's full out shopping day..... again!'. Have I ever mentioned that shopping is NOT on my "fun things to do" list? Well, now you know. After hours and hours of bouncing from store to store, waiting outside of dressing rooms for Bryanna, inside dressing rooms with Lauren, and trying to convince Rylie that she did NOT need to consult with her sisters for every single item, we were finally down to the last pair of shorts for Lauren. Yipee!!! I grabbed the items we were purchasing, put back the NO WAY ARE YOU WEARING THOSE and instructed her to hurry, get dressed so we could finally head home. (this is where I pray everyone is as visual as i am)We are standing outside the dressing rooms, patiently waiting for Lauren to get herself dressed and out. I am leaning against a clothes rack, Bryanna standing there slouched, and Rylie flying around like a boomerang. After about 10 minutes of drooling, i asked Bryanna to PLEASE go tell Lauren we were leaving. I see her go in and come out quickly and not too far behind is Lauren, marching with little fast steps. As she comes through all the rack of clothes I notice two things... One, Lauren is wearing shorts that are about 10 times too big for her and Two, Rylie has all of a sudden emerged laughing so hard her face has turned crimson red, her dimples are so deep in her face, and she is starting to tip over and fall on the floor. Lauren has a hand full of excess shorts bunched up in her hands with a very confused look on her face. I say, "Lauren! It's time to leave... what are you doing"?
She gets the 'are you kidding me' look and grits her teeth saying, "I am doing what you asked... trying clothes on"!
Okay... here is another 'HUH?' moment. Right after she finished her sentence, Rylie's laugh became louder and louder as she struggles to find air and say, "I am playing jokes on her"!!!

Rylie decided it would be great fun to pick out a few items of clothing, take them into the dressing room, only stick her arm in and holding back the giggles, tell Lauren, "Here.. Mommy wants you to try this on". She came back 4 times and did this!! It was only after she had tried on 2 mens's shirts and her second pair of women's shorts that Bryanna was sent in. Bryanna and I looked at each other and began to laugh outloud as Lauren scowled her way back to the dressing room mumbling under her breath. Rylie was still tickled to tears that she was able to "joke" her into trying on all those ridiculous clothes.
Rylie... oh my little doll Rylie!! Have I ever told you that you and you alone are almost as funny as your Mommy?? hee hee

Inspired Insanity

Trying to force inspired insanity is kind of like trying to open your eyelids after they have been super glued shut. When you look for the good within the bad, sometimes you find that laughing won't help you find it any quicker, but it will at least look like you didn't get there with your face sliding accross the dirt! I try as best I can to not let the moments in life that make me want to pout like a child, scream like a baby and throw a temper tantrum lead me.I imagine that some would read my blogs and wonder what kind of Mother would write such things to embarass her children. Well, actually... that kind of Mother probably wouldn't read my blogs. Eh... too bad!! So getting through the potholes of life, the sinking ships of the day and the moments of pure delightful insanity, I come to you full of smiles and sunshine. Only with the help of my new addiction, Starbucks, do I bounce off the walls of your brain and pull you into my crazy world!! Please wipe your feet at the door.

I am ashamed to say I haven't been carrying around my notepad and pencil to jot down all 'crazy' the girls display. As a matter of fact, even my mental notes are roaming at the bottom of my purse. I am here to let out a big WOO HOO for the end to summer. Back on schedule!! Earlier bedtimes, less fighting because they aren't spending every minute of the day with each other, and no more driving to work singing the theme song to iCarly, Spongebob and Wizards of Waverly Place. Our resident teenager is currently boycotting home until the very last possible moment. My littest doll keeps reminding me that we should 'sell that girl already' when referring to Lauren. And Lauren, well... she has new battle scars to show on her first day of school. OH THE EXCITMENT SHE HAS!!

This blog makes no sense and has no point whatsoever. Who cares!! I felt like writing tonight and I smiled the entire way through. Are you surprised? Naw!! People don't smile enough if you ask me. If you can't find a smile... borrow one, steal one, grow one. Whatever it is that you must do, always remember to smile. My life with my dolls allows me to continue doing just that. Hope to see you again sooner rather than later. Cross your fingers!! <3

Dr. Lauren to Emergency... Dr. Lauren to Emergency!!

Oh my dolls!! What funny things have you done for me lately??
Lauren is my gimpy girl these days--- 22 stitches to the leg! OUCH! At least this time she didn't lecture the doctor and make me sing while her stitches were being put in.
Lauren is our family 'accident child'. We are all very clumsy, but when Lauren does it.... she goes BIG!!! Last year at this time, she sliced the side of her foot. So there we were, Lauren bleeding all over the place. The doctor comes in with a needle full. He sits down and explains that he will be injecting the contents of the needle into her wound. It wasn't going to hurt, but that she would feel the pressure. He goes on to explain it will help numb the pain of him putting in the stitches. Here it goes.... needle in, and OMGsh!! Lauren wanted to rip his face off!! She gave him a look I had never seen (except on me, of course). She grabbed my hand and squeezed! UGH.. please give me some of whatever it is she is getting! STAT!!!
Whew, we got through the needle. On to stitches! Before the doctor breaks out the sewing kit, Lauren, with her big beautiful chocolate eyes says, "Mommy, will you sing to me while he is putting in the stitches"? Oh goodness! Now I'm the entertainment? I was just the squeeze toy a few minutes ago.
Of course I couldn't say no. And on we go! The doctor and his nurse swaying back and forth as they are sewing her up, me singing away!! LOL
When he was done, he proudly announced it was his first time stitching someone to live entertainment! Yikes! (i guess i was glad he didn't stitch my mouth shut, hee hee)
"All stitched up"! the Dr. tells Lauren.
"See, it wasn't bad at all, was it"?
OH NO-NO-NO!! Why did he have to ask that question!?!?!
Lauren looks at him with a softer kind of crazy and said, "You said that needle wasn't going to hurt. It did! Clearly you lied to me"! (oh heaven help me, she's going off)...
she twitched her head to the side and scolded him with her finger shaking up and down,
"I really think that if you are going to be doing this kind of job, you should tell kids how much it really hurts! It isn't nice to lie"!!

I wasn't even sure what to do at that point. She did tell him 'thank you'! :)

So with the first visit, and this last one on Monday, Lauren is thinking she has the hang of this whole 'stitch' thing and is confident she might be able to repair herself next time. Hmmm..... saves me a co-pay! Woo hoo!! If she does a really good job, we will take outside appointments! :P

Bryanna!! That was just MEAN! (giggle~giggle)

Summer means sleeping in, being lazy, swimming, sleeping in and SLEEPING IN! Of course, not for me, but the girls get to sleep in a bit. So... of the dolls, Lauren is my early riser. She wakes up with the sun and wonders why everyone else doesn't. Bryanna and Rylie are of the same mold. An earthquake could be happening and they will think someone is rocking them to sleep. Not to mention, they are the crankiest children when forced to wake up before NOON!
Sunday morning was going to be busy. Bryanna was having her end of softball party at the park at 10am and even knowing this information 2 weeks ahead of time, I was still un prepared. In true procrastination style, I waited until the morning of the party to pick up the fruit to make my fruit trays. Lauren, being my morning sunshine, was all smiles that morning and happy to tag along to the store. As we got ready to head out, I woke up Bryanna, which took about a good 20 minutes of shaking and pulling of her toes and instructed her to get up, get Rylie out of bed (that was really just mean on my part knowing the chaos that was coming) and help her get ready. I figured once I got back home, Bryanna could head to the park to meet up with her teammates. I tried to hurry myself along knowing the battle Bryanna was up against at home. Although, I did chuckle in my hands a few times thinking that she would now understand what a difficult job I had all year. (Okay.. I will admit.. I slowed down a few times down the aisles)
So, we get home... I open the door and lookie, lookie!!! Rylie is sitting so pretty on the couch. Hands in her lap, dressed so adorably. Her toothless smile so big, dimples so deep in her cheeks. She said with a high pitched voice, "Hi Mommy"!
WOW!! I was IMPRESSED! I told Bryanna what a great job she did and thanked her several times before she bolted out the door. I finished up my slicing and arranging of the fruit trays, wrapped them and grabbed the keys. "Let's go, dolls"!
Rylie jumped to her feet and sweetly asked, "So, Mommy, how many people will be at MY party?".......... UMMMMMMMMMM... HUH??!!!!
"My party. How many people will be there?"
My brain started to put it together and all I could think of was OH CRAP! I was trying so hard not to laugh at what Bryanna had done. I was irritated she had thought of that and I had not! So now I have to tell my smiley little doll baby that her sister was very mean (yet, so creative... secret kudos to Bryanna) and the party wasn't for her. Good thing her 6 year old mind forgot all about it once we got there. I am definitely trying that out on Bryanna one day, though! HA!! Genius! lol

Woo Hoo for ME!!

I have made two new friends. Toss and Turn! Well, they aren't new I guess, but they are becoming frequent visitors in my bedtime life. They fight with each other and are always putting me right in the middle of their battle. Eventually I am forced to 'break it up' and jump to my feet with an unbalanced landing and cloudy vision. I drag myself to the kitchen for an unwanted glass of water, then peek in the fridge for no reason at all, head to the bathroom to admire my bedhead, my puffy eyes and slouching shoulders. I crawl back into the ring aka: my bed, and start to make rules for Mr. Toss and Mr. Turn that will undoubtedly be ignored. Well things are going to change soon...
The dolls are officially out of school and in my brilliant brain, I start to think of the most selfish positives I can. For example... Yipee!!! I get to sleep in an extra HOUR!!! Woo Hoo for ME!! I don't have to help them get ready for school because grandma doesn't care if they show up in pajamas! Woo Hoo for ME!! Feed them? Really? Naw.. that's okay, grandma LOVES making breakfast for them! Woo Hoo for ME!! Baths??? Umm... well, they will be getting in the pool the minute they are done eating breakfast (or shall I pretend 30 minutes later), so they can shower after that... AT GRANDMAS! Woo Hoo for ME!! Okay, no more 'Woo Hoo'ing'... but Yipee for ME! :)

I made it through another year of school without a straight jacket! I would like an award please! I am a frequent passenger of the Crazy Train and I want my damn award already!! Big sigh of relief that I am here. Yes.. I know.. It is like a marriage when everything in the beginning was an everyday thing and now... well, ya know.. when I think of it, or am in the mood... I tickle the keys to write a little somthin'. Hee Hee.. do they make little blue pills for this sort of thing? Oh gosh! Did i really say that! ahaha... and on that note... let's end this entry. hee hee hee

Woo Hoo! Insanity lives!!

Lalalalalala!!! Do you think that if I filled up a page of singing to the rays of the sun I could hold your attention? Yeah.. didn't think so!! Hmm... let's see... life continues on the crazy path that I stepped on so long ago. It's gotten more challenging since I am a single mother raising 3 barnyard animals. The circus turned me down when trying to negotiate vacation for the girls. For some reason, they think caging them wouldn't be good. And WHAT? It's no different than the closet I keep them in at home!! Ugh! Okay~okay.... I really am kidding about that. My girls don't keep me on my toes, they knock me down with a perfect blend of insanity and laughter that just cannot be explained in words.
Have I mentioned to you that my cutest little blue eyed doll Rylie is somewhat of a racist? Tell me you don't think that is funny! Just try it! She has her own racial profiling going on. You can tell if someone is a Mexican if they are holding a tortilla in their hand. Hey... I am just repeating!! Oh please! No gasping! She IS Mexican... I know it.. she denies it.... give a girl her dream why don't you! Sheesh!!
Lauren has earned the blue ribbon for #1 MOMMY PATIENCE TESTER. A few times I think I actually saw the wheels spinning while she was working out a debate in her head. I am careful to word everything so there couldn't possibly be any loopholes. At this very moment... I still haven't figured out how to do that effectively!
Bryanna... well... she is going to be 13 in a couple of months! Yup! Enough said!

I have tried so many times to get back to doing what I love the most, next to my girls of course. Writing was my getaway from reality. Wait! Umm, that's wrong. It was me documenting MY reality. And WOW! What a wonderful reality I have. The chaos continues in such a way I couldn't possibly be anything but smiley!! Looking at my life from the outside, you might see that we don't have much of anything. I disagree and ask that you look a little closer. The blessings I have are coated with fun and uncontrollable happiness that only lives where I allow it to. A perfect life for me is a life that has my dolls in it. My little racist, debating, drama queen dolls!! Life is fabulous. Welcome once again to my insanity!! You'll love it here!!!

Still squeezing the lemons life hands me

In my crazy world, things continue to change on a minute by minute basis. My girls adjust accordingly and manage to help continue the laughter within my marshmallow walls. I am handed these scripts in my life that I shake my head at and wonder what the ending will be. Will the insanity get the better of me? Oh my goodness.... I hope so! I am comfortable living life through grape soda colored glasses. They give off that extra fizz that sometimes I cannot manage to find. I try to teach my girls that in life you will meet people that will not be so positive. They will try to knock you down the mountain we have climbed together. It's okay to feel compassion for them. Not everyone will look at life the way we do, and in the end, you will still have a smile on your face with many around you, while they will continue to spread "moldy" vibes that will only make others turn away. It has been so long since I have sat and written anything. I keep scheduling time and the schedule disappears with the sock in the wash. My intentions are good, but I suck at motivating myself for this ever needed therapy. I have this basket full of "life lemons" i can't seem to catch up on. I'm sick of lemonade..Ewww. I already know what the first few entries will be. Yup! looking over this one already and haven't seen one sentence of running into doors, explaining the one eyed donkey, pull my finger or even the Food City story. Maybe this is my start.... again! I miss writing. I miss putting down my funny stories of Rylie and the "Mexican Kids". I haven't written in the book either... figures. So with this non funny, weird kind of spill your guts to get out the yucky, I hope to be making you laugh soon!! Until then, expect an "off" few entries... hope you stick it out with me!!
Valeri